When one of my friends was having a bit of a rough ride recently, she kept playing the song ‘Everything’s gonna be alright’ by Sweetbox. I listened to it myself quite a few times, and I love how they mix Bach with what they do.

My point is that I do feel ‘everything’s gonna be alright’. It always was going to be, but the rollercoaster ride of life can certainly have its challenges. I’ve gone from in January feeling I was starting again at ‘ground zero’ with nothing in my diary. No idea of where to begin or what to do. Now I have work (not constant and not enough yet to fully live from) until October 19th, and have been allocated some possible dates for some rural touring work for next year (they will confirm by the end of April).

So, what’s the journey been like? Shit at times, and great at times. Scary and amazing. Putting myself out there again and contacting venues. Emails and phone calls and selling myself, and waking up in the middle of the night worrying if people will come to see me and what do I do next, or I have to do this and this, and get a flyer done, and get them ordered, and contact more venues and then how can I promote it? Writing press releases etc… The part that the audience get to see is the best of me. I stand and I shine my light and do the thing I love the most for people, and I love that bit. It’s all the background stuff that is the difficult part. God give me strength and all that (constantly mumbling spiritual prayers under my breath).

I am learning though. To have a better balance in my life. To take time out. To breathe and to walk in nature, and to let go a bit and not worry too much. I’ve started my concerts in the Yorkshire Dales now in Village Halls. I’ve done three of them. Loved it. L-O-V-E-D it. The first in Burton in Lonsdale was cracking.

Ruth, the lady I had booked the hall through had put my flyer up in every available space in the area (slight exaggeration there, ha ha), but I was all over the place and at least people knew I was going. Lovely audience, good banter, lovely comments in my comments book. Booked me the day after for another date in October. Great. No messing. Back in the game Micky Flanagan style. I got a standing ovation too (and I know us Brits don’t do them willy nilly, like the Dutch do. They give standing ovations all the time). Phew!

The hardest thing about organising your own events is getting it out there to people. In the Dales noone knows who I am. Noone has heard me sing, and it really helps to have someone the other end to plug it for me. It’s been in The Craven Herald newspaper, on social media, and me and Jon have been round putting flyers through doors. Craven Council got in touch too about them, saying they had some funding they needed to use up before the end of month for arts events in rural locations, so I got money to cover my costs for hiring the venues and my marketing costs, plus a new poster for an ad campaign. Really lovely and a real boost to me emotionally too. I was slightly more worried about the Embsay and Bradley ones. I had sold 6 tickets online for the first one, and 2 for the second. Not a great feeling. Every musician likes performing to an audience and what I do works better with more people, because we create the atmosphere together and it really is ‘the more the merrier’. I went through a range of emotions thinking if only 2 people turn up, what do I do? Will anyone else come? Then I said to myself too ‘It doesn’t matter Nick. It’s just a moment and a few hours’. A few years ago I would have found it really hard and been upset by it, but I just surrendered to it and thought ‘whatever’. I’ll stand up and sing if there are 2 people or 2000. Just do my thing and make sure whoever is there walks away feeling it was worth it and that they enjoyed it. And that’s what I did. I had 12 at the first one and 11 people at the second, but every person walked away happy. I did my mission. I was grateful that 11 people came when I thought there may only be 2. Two years ago I would have been gutted that only 11 came, but perspectives change and I think it’s only going to bloom and grow from this point on. Just keep getting up and singing to whoever is there, then the next audience and the next. Giving them all I have to give and not feeling deterred or worried. Planting seeds. I know what I do works. Every thing I encounter becomes part of my story, and I’ve been humbled to the point where I don’t think I can be humbled anymore by the past few years. Not many classical musicians can say that. I got so many lovely comments in my book. Let the ‘people’ speak. I also love how different a concert can be when people choose totally different songs from my Song Menu.

One guy even wrote me a little four line poem on Saturday at the end saying it was the best £10 he’d spent all year.

I’m now in contact with some rural touring companies who may be able to organise the concerts in venues, so I just turn up and do what I do best, which would be the ideal scenario. It would take away all this extra work I am doing myself, but even so I’m still not out of the woods. I can’t sustain myself solely from singing again yet, so I have to keep investing in it and getting myself out there.

Onto my Julie show. Check out my new roller banner for it, and look at Mary Poppins in my lounge too. Hard core Julie fan that I am.

I had to cancel the first one in Grassington. Rachel, one of my pianists has had to cancel all her work due to sickness and I was given some other names by George my other pianist, but when it came to it, I couldn’t cope with the stress of getting it together with someone else in a short time and doing my ‘opera for the people’ at the same time. Toooooooo much. In the past I would have bust a gut to make it work, but I’m not that person now. I just rescheduled it for September 3rd, and if I am honest I had sold very few tickets anyway so I think I would have struggled anyhow. I’m hoping from the concerts I’m doing now that the word will spread a bit and people will come to it later in the year. I could sugar coat things but this is how it’s been. Doing what I can to get it all out there. Once people are through the door they are in for a treat, but until they come through the door I can only do so much.

Dates for the diary for ‘Opera for the People’ and ‘A Spoonful of Julie’ are:

Kettlewell Village Hall April 9th

Eldroth Village Hall April 23rd

Hellifield Village Hall April 30th

The Barlow, Edgworth May7th (A Spoonful of Julie)

The Wellington Rooms Halifax May 14th

Saltburn Theatre June 10th (A Spoonful of Julie)

Halifax Playhouse June 25th (A Spoonful of Julie)

Royal Northern College of Music July 3rd

Notton Village Hall August 5th

Bishop Monckton Village Hall August 19th

The Octagon Theatre, Grassington Town Hall September 3rd (A Spoonful of Julie)

The Coro, Ulverston September 9th (A Spoonful of Julie)

Todmorden Town Hall September 30th (A Spoonful of Julie)

If anyone can take flyers, put them up somewhere or spread the word, let me know and I’ll get flyers to you. Any help is greatly appreciated. Nothing is better advertisement than someone else spreading the word when they have enjoyed something, so tell people too. I want my ears to burn a bit.

This year is all or nothing. I said it at the end of last year. It’s time. I feel it in my gut. Time to set the dominoes going and get some momentum going. I can’t be busting a gut forever, waiting for things to get going. That’s over. It’s about doing my mission now and really getting going with it, and I do feel this is it now. The start. It will only grow more and more from this point. If you want to come and see me, look on my website at http://www.iamnicolamills.com for tickets or contact me on 07838360195 or via email at nicolamillsthesinger@hotmail.co.uk